It has been quite a couple of busy days here in the south of France. Yet the Lord is sure to not take a vacation... As i mentioned before in the blog coming home always seems to bring peace and with peace comes clarity. The holidays or vacations present a certain challenge...it is quite easy to delight in the small pleasures of being on a break such as sleeping late, eating bunches,or just splurging in all aspects of life. Which brings me to think about my initial point, that our Creator knows little about the concept of taking a break... God created the universe ( just about everything we physically know) only rested for a day ; the perfect conception of mankind and matter and a days rest was his only known break. Jesus was a pretty busy character to , he kept going from place to place and always with purpose. Side note to all this, i always wondered what kind of sandals jesus would wear today, or how many sandals he burned out because he walked so much. Coming back to the subject... our God is a god of purpose and intent, no man is left behind, he is faithful. Gods faithfulness is only limited by our own unfaithfulness and unbelief that he is indeed : faithful. Gods faithfulness never rests... and as it never rests it met me today here , in my place of rest, i may not have been looking for it but He was sure to stir a fire in my heart.
For more than perfect the day was something weird in me was stirring , i describe it as "something was with me or in me", this feeling that literally something is over your soul, not necessarily a bad feeling but that enables your ability to function, to think , to feel. Late in the afternoon Lauren proposed the idea of going for a jog. Feeling the way i was feeling i was highly opposed or simply just stubborn to get mooving. I ended up strapping some shoes and going at the last second and the outcome was unpredictable. I decided to listen to some music ( worship) while running so i strapped my ipod. As soon as the first notes hit a sudden energy overcame me , i prayed, i prayed that God in this time could deliver me of this "funky" feeling, that he could speak with me, the first 3 minutes were of light jogging as i stared at a beautiful sunset...and then something kicked. Coming back a couple of hours in the day i was sitting at home and watched a video about africa and mission http://vimeo.com/9071435. To fully understand this story know that my heart has had a desire to go speak the hope and glory of the good news of our lord jesus over that land... my heart once burned for africa, that fire slowly burned out with time. As the song played i was reminded of that video i had watched earlier ... of this calling to obey, to believe and go despite of our fears, about how much my heart craves the adventure of the unknown and dangerous gospel preaching. I was reminded of Jesus love for the broken in Africa, my heart burned again for them, as i ran the words of the video " who is going to love us" heavily resounded in my heart. When the worship song reached its chorus i found myself sprinting... full on power blasting through the sidewalk... a fire was burning in me. I wanted to run to Jesus... i wanted to run to where he will have me by his presence, i wanted to be free from all things and right then just go go go, i wanted to be with abba. I never ran like i ran today... i held my hands in worship as i ran... jesus was running with me , working with me , speaking to me at every step. He told me how he loves me , how he loves those people in africa and if i wanted i could be the feet that carry the good news but that he loves me no matter what, He told me how he is faithful over all things like my family, relationships, comfort or even my own life. Jesus ran by my side, he even gave me push to run a little faster...
I want to run with Him... i want to run to Him. So today , tonight a heavy heart and a joyous heart is with me for i know He is at work as i ask hard question like "where do you want me to run that i may find you?". I sure dont know where the Lord has his path written for me but i certainly look forward to reveal my love in faithfulness to His calling, its the least i can do for my Jesus.
So Jesus i am willing to go, please show me the way....
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